The Book of Rubbish Ideas

May your internet searches always take you to where you want to go.

You know, technology is a wonderful thing.

Well, it is if you understand it.

Meet me - probably the most techno-thick-chick this side of Norfolk.

I cannot toggle the telly between the DVD and the TV, let alone programme the flippin’ video to tape anything. I’m constantly confused by the double light switch at the bottom of the stairs and I’m eternally grateful that the kettle has just the one on/off switch.

So imagine my joy when I was introduced to Thomas, the wonderful administrator of this blog, my mentor and saviour. He does the techie and I do the text. But I must say, even I can use the control pad thingie that comes with a WordPress blog.

One of the bits I love the most, is the button that tells you what phrases or words people have done a search on, in order to find their way to your website.

I thought it might be fun to give you a run down of a handful of them, along with my thoughts on what they wanted to know. Some are witty, some are poignant and others are just off the wall and as I’m feeling a little vacant this evening (it’s been a lovely but long day) I thought I’d just throw up a few random thoughts.

Chilli and apple chutney - see the yummy recipe nobbled from River Cottage and whack in another few spoonfuls of the chilli if you want to blow your socks off.

Rubbish website - they got it right on the money there, in the nicest possible way I hope.

What to do with leftover flatbread - if it’s on the same day as making them, put then into an airtight container and they should be good for a few days. If they’ve air dried out a bit, knock up a chilli or Bolognese and stuff them, roll them, sprinkle a bit of cheese on the top and whack them in the oven to melt the cheese and serve with a crispy salad.

Rubbish computers - tell me about it…

Reducing rubbish can clear the nature - how true. If our rubbish were more thoroughly rerouted to recycling bins and the country had more of a focus on keeping Britain (or wherever else) tidy again, our waterways would benefit, our hedgerows would be cleaner and safer for wildlife, our oceans would have far less pollution and the marine mammals who suffer horrible fates wrapped and trapped in plastic bags, would survive. A healthy food chain is essential for all life to thrive. Why not organise a community rubbish clear up in your village, town, park or recreation ground.

Washable homemade blood - the mind boggles, but I think they might have been looking for washable sanitary protection (at least I hope they were)

Chutney jars - reuse any old glass jar, anything at all, but be careful when you seal them up that you don’t fill them up to the very top if you have metal lids, because they will react with the vinegar and go all yucky…

Fabulous radio ideas - interesting - well, you could always tune into my show on a Wednesday between 10 and 1 and I’ll give you one or two.

A story about rubbish - actually, I quite fancy whipping up a bit of fiction and might be testing it out on you soon, so beware.

Garments made from rubbish - or how about garments dressed with rubbish instead? Use funky patches cut out from other knackered garments, sew on buttons and embellishments, letters made from felt are fun too or beads from old broken necklaces. In fact, anything that takes it from dull and ordinary is great; be creative and brave, buy a needle and cotton today.

Tracey - how absolutely random is that and what are the chances I was the one they were looking for! LOL…ah well.

Working mums household tips - I know what you mean sister. We have enough on our plates and need life to be a little easier on us at times. Please have a trawl through this website and definitely check out the free to read Kitchen and Study chapters. Oh, and get to grips with the Fabulous Rubbish Flatbreads - they are great fun, quick to master and lovely to do with the kids. Involve your children in the greening up progress for their benefit and yours too.

Rubbish solution ideas - I can only hope they found something to tickle their fancy.

Cowboys and indians Cath Kidson changing - ah, now you need to read my interview with the lovely Lara Burgoine.

What to put on flatbread - that’s easy. How about a line of mayo down the centre, salad, a handful of pine nuts and chicken left over from Sunday lunch. Or some on-the-turn banana all mushed up then rolled up and drizzled with melted chocolate. Or stuffed with tuna, sprouting seeds and grated carrot, the list is endless.

Special offer code Alastair Sawday - you can still get the book at a reduced rate! Pick it up for £4.54 instead of £6.99 - result!

Economic downturn green - now you need to read a cracker of a post - one of my favourites in fact - hope that hit the mark.

How you might reuse a glass jar - well apart from the obvious thought of filling it back up with good food, you could store buttons, open packets of lentils or butterbeans, have a painting session with the kids and use them to host tea lights, or stick a ball of string or garden twine inside and seal the lid trapping the end so you can easily find it again!

There you go.

An eclectic selection from today’s visitors and now my brain has completely emptied it’s definitely time for bed!

I’ll give you something chunky and profound tomorrow - promise!

Rubbishly yours

TSzzzzzzzz